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Aug 4, 2015

Full Show Script

  • [Thai translated]

  • EVO: As you heard in the opening clip, I got a new tattoo about a month ago. I've been considering it since before we left The States, and decided to pull the trigger here in Thailand.
  • SHE: Seriously, that's a pretty weak pun, dude. 

  • EVO: Noted. 

  • SHE: Woodee from 84 Tattoo Andaman Ink -- that probably rolls off the tongue better in Thai -- did the work, which took about three hours. The first time.

  • EVO: She said "first time" because when I went to get a little touchup on some lines and color... well. You'll hear.

  • [Tattoo redo]

  • EVO: Pretty sure that's Thai for "stupid Americans". We'll cover the dentist a little later.

  • SHE: Woodee is a bit of a perfectionist and insisted on redoing ALL of the outline. All of it. AND the vast majority of the color work. It now looks even better, though I'm not sure Evo would have went back had he known he'd be back in the chair for another 2 hours, going over the same not-quite-healed body art.

  • EVO: You know... Back in the day, I'd have have released all 2 hours of tattoo audio and called it a show. I'm amazed at how much I've grown as a storyteller.

  • SHE: And as you heard in that clip, we also went to the dentist or dental hygienist recently. That was... interesting. Super cheap, like $30 each, but interesting. 

  • EVO: Here's the process, in a nutshell: You sit in the normal dental chair, which is immediately and rather quickly placed in the prone position. You're handed a small plastic mirror so you can watch the procedure (as if). The dentist/dental hygienist hooks the spit-sucking tool on the of your mouth, she goes to work with the water pick and scaler. 15 minutes later, you're done. And a little dazed.

  • [Clean dentist]

  • SHE: We recorded audio of the entire experience. But I'm a nice person who thinks the tattoo gun noise was enough torture for one show. 

  • EVO: Don't think that all our experiences have been painful. We've been taking full advantage of thai massage shops since we've been in country. We were told by Mr. John Lenahan, professional traveling magician and fantastic author, that you could tell the legit places from the skeezy places pretty easily.

  • SHE: If the girls are wearing hot pants, it's definitely one of those establishments, so you'll want to bring some extra cash. (Wait... bring extra cash? Shouldn't we advice simply "Don't go in"?)

  • EVO: (Hey, I'm trying to serve all possible audiences, Honey. Just stick to the script.)

  • SHE: We'll talk about this later. 

  • EVO: Uh... Ok. Anyhow, while Sheila was finishing up her massage from our standard, non-hot-pants-wearing establishment, the owner of the shop took advantage of my free time to practice her English. And to cast a little doubt on John's advice. It seems some girls in the legit establishments like to do a little... freelancing.

  • [Extra massage]

  • EVO: She's gesturing to the young woman who just finished massaging Sheila.

  • SHE: Good news for her: We're poor, too. We wont be spending money for anything "extra" at the massage studio. Right, honey?

  • EVO: Right honey. and as you've seen from our various social status updates this week... we took some private thai food cooking lessons.

  • [Cooking school]

  • SHE: For about $20 total, we learned how to shop and prepare three tasty thai dishes. There's a video montage on Evo's YouTube pageour Facebook page, and now in these show notes.

  • EVO: And now, Sheila has seven things she can cook! 

  • SHE:You're already in enough trouble over this show. Don't push it. For the rest of you, we're considering doing a question and answer show next week. So if you have questions, send them to us however you like. 

  • EVO: Bonus points if you record yourself asking them.

  • SHE: But that's not necessary. Just ask us anything you like about traveling, housesitting, how I keep from killing him... If we get enough, it might make for a fun show. And you'll get more of our live, back-and-forth banter you like so much.

  • EVO: And try not to ask questions that will get me killed, OK? Cheers from Thailand!

  • SHE: Funding for our endless world tour is provided, oddly enough, by postcards.

  • EVO: Give us five bucks, and we'll send you a hand-written postcard from our travels abroad every single month. Get on the list at ShEvo.wtf/postcards

  • SHE: And we save a ton of money by housesitting. It's free and beats living in hotels. Want super cool people like us looking after your pets and property while you're traveling? Visit ShEvo.wtf/stayforfree to register, either as a housesitter or a home owner. We do it, and we love it! Thanks for listening to this episode. I’m Sheila Dee. 

  • EVO: And I am Evo Terra. Our theme music is by Kevin MacLeod at incompetech.com. All other sounds, voices, and odd bits you hear were most likely created or captured by us. Visit ShEvo.wtf to get more goodness from us and to see where opportunity will take us next. Thanks for again for listening and tell a friend about us. Now would be good.